Loneliness

As we approach the twilight years of our life the busy schedule of family and friends soon fade into a time when we find ourselves alone. Our spouses have passed over or as many of us do today, we go our separate ways. After spending so many years working, raising children, and consuming our time with relationships we find we have reached a point in life where others just don’t think about us as much. As we age we lose certain freedoms and slowly, but surely, we find ourselves confined to home alone. Please do not despair. Our bodies age for a reason. It slows us down from the hustle and bustle of life so we can spend more time focusing on our future.

Something inside of me has always been there. It is an urge to re-acquaint myself with God. I don’t find myself special in any way. The articles I write on our various websites are fairly basic stuff. I take a subject or a word and research it on biblegateway.com. I study the scripture and expound on the verses using my personal testimony and my life’s experiences. Anyone can do it. My desire is to grow closer to our heavenly Father. The articles are a simple way of sharing with you what I have learned. I do okay with one on one conversations, but I would never attempt to address a large group of people. It just isn’t my way. It seems so impersonal. When I am here it is just a conversation between you, me, and God. We don’t have to get dressed up. We can sit comfortably at our computer and communicate, share with each other.

  I spend a lot of time by myself. I divorced many years ago and never remarried. I have dedicated the last 20 years of my life to the ministry God has entrusted to me. Even though there are times when I am around a lot of people, most of the time I stay to myself. I find that I have developed some unusual habits. I talk to myself.  At first I thought I was losing control of my faculties, until I realized that I am never alone. The Holy Spirit of God is always with me. I speak to Him, and in turn He speaks to me.  His responses are not, as we say, normal human communication. He is God. He doesn’t pull or push us. He just stands there, with His arm around our soul, waiting for us to have fellowship with Him. If there is stress in our life, He is there to comfort us. When I share what’s on my mind I stop and listen for a response. It may be an answer to a situation or it may be a still, small voice that may be just what I needed. If you let your mind run out of control you will never hear.

We have to work at relationships whether they be human or Divine. No worthwhile relationship comes easy.  With God it is a matter of spending time with Him during daily Bible study and prayer. We should strive to understand God’s Word just as a detective tries to solve a complicated case. The Bible is the most amazing book I have ever read. It reveals itself over time. It is a living work just as Jesus Christ is the living Word. Careful, dedicated study brings us closer to God. His Word removes the darkness out of loneliness and  transforms our solitude into light.

Jesus spent time alone every chance He had. … He went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray. Later that night, He was there alone. Matthew 14:23 NIV  He spent that time in prayer with His Father. Thanks to His unselfish sacrifice His Father is now our Father. He gives us the same opportunity He has to have a personal relationship with Almighty God. Most of us, myself included, see our heavenly Father as being too busy running the universe. He is somewhere up in heaven stuck in a meeting or something. This is simply not true. Many Bible verses express God as being alone.  He is not as busy as you might think. He is not up in heaven somewhere He is in your mind. He is the fiber of your being. He resides in every cell of our body and holds those cells together to form our being. He longs to share His overwhelming love for us.

 

Developing a prayer life takes time. It is something almost anyone can do. If you are home-bound you can sit in your recliner and spend countless hours with your Savior. The most important thing to do is illuminate all distractions. Turn the T.V. off and set your phone on mute. My first prayer is to ask God to open my spiritual eyes and ears so that I will understand the scripture. I study my Bible, and then I try and get as comfortable as I can. I relax the muscles in my neck, shoulders, and arms. When I first close my eyes I don’t say anything. I think about the scripture I just read, and I try to remove all other thoughts from my mind. I now start a conversation with my heavenly Father. I thank Him for the day and the abundance of things He has provided me. I discuss with Him my family’s physical and spiritual needs. Then I spend time with Him discussing the issues of those who are a vital part of  my ministry. I spend the last part of my prayer time discussing world issues. That’s right! Please read our article, The “Power of Prayer.” You also might find it interesting to read, “Walking with God.”

Each one of us is greater than the worst we have ever done. Looking back on past mistakes is not conducive to happiness. Never be a prisoner of your past, it was just a lesson, not a life sentence. We are always to look forward. Each of us have done things we wish we could do over. Mistakes and failures in life is for our own education, and are placed there for the future of our success. It is a good thing to spend time discussing our past with our heavenly Father. Take the time and list everything that comes to mind. A prayer journal is a wonderful tool of prayer. Write down the issues that are on your mind and then read them to the Lord. Then tear the page out of the book wad it up, and throw it in the trash, because those things are totally behind us. All the sins of mankind are forgiven so there is no reason to dwell on the past anymore.

Rock bottom is the solid foundation on which I built my life. Twenty years ago I separated myself from anything that was contrary to the will of God. If you are a new Christian, or are starting over late in life, base your new adventure on the Rock, the cornerstone, Jesus Christ. He is the stone the builders rejected. His foundation is sure and true, and His relationship with you will be based on what is right. Many seniors are just now overcoming drug, alcohol, and physical abuse. We find that we have separated ourselves from our family, and loneliness is one of our greatest struggles. Many of us feel sorrow and think, “Who cares if one more light goes out when the sky is full of stars.” I tell you with great conviction that your light never goes out. You are an eternal being. One way or another you will live forever. For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. Romans 14:7 NIV Jesus and I care very much about you, so take the focus off of yourselves and place it on others. I promise you will not have time to focus on how lonely you are if you are busy helping others. Can’t get out of the house? Start a phone ministry checking in on other seniors. I knew a lady named Grace. Her entire ministry was sending birthday cards to people. I loved her so much. Every birthday I would get a card, a special handwritten note, and two pieces of gum. It was the greatest birthday present ever!!!

Loneliness prospers in a heart that never smiles.  If I catch myself feeling lonely or unhappy I start singing hymns. I love the old hymns. It reminds me of when I was young riding in the car with my mom and dad. We were always singing, smiling, and having a great time. It doesn’t really matter what time it is. It doesn’t really matter what day it is to me, I’m free. All that really matters is I’m alive, feeling fine, singing happily. I have put a music player on this website with all my favorite old time hymns. Hope you will enjoy it.

 

…I have upheld since your birth,
and have carried since you were born.
 Even to your old age and gray hairs
I am He, I am He who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

Isaiah 46:3-5 NIV

This article is dedicated to my Mom. She is 91 years old.